Friday Feels - Good Vibes: How to Get Them, How to Give Them, and How to Be Them.

I truly can't complain about life, it has been good. But, with all the countless good things that have come into my life, comes a lot of other stuff. I very often refer to this stuff as "the bullshit". I've had my fair share of hard knocks, heartache, and tragedy that goes without saying, but I'm not one to cry over spilled milk (unless it's spilled breast milk, that is a whole different blog that would include real tears). Let's face it, the bullshit exists in all capacities of life no matter what you are doing - I try to remind myself that even Beyonce has to deal with it. In this, the holly jolly holiday season, it sometimes comes up even more than on our regular days (and at 6.5 months pregnant especially, it gets difficult to maintain a sense of jingle all the way). I know you all feel me! So how do we keep it together? How we refrain from being the jerk, or the "not better person"? At this time of year, more than any, I think it's crucial that we find a way to achieve, maintain, and project good.

Good vibes. Marky Mark sang about them way back when, and he kinda hit the nail on the head:

Yo! It's about that time
To bring forth the rhythm and the rhyme
I'm a get mine so get yours

I want to see sweat comin' out your pores

Think of them as karma. My mom always told me since I was a very little girl to not let things get me upset - what goes around comes around. At 32 I still have a hard time admitting that every single thing my mother ever told me was true, but those are the facts. She was right (about everything). Situations, people, and circumstances that killed my spirits, broke my heart, and made me sick all made their way around again in some form or another - without me having to act or do anything at all except be the person I am. I digress. Good vibes come naturally to good people. Genuinely original, nice, happy people are always enjoyable! We can't help it! I remember being at points in my life where I was so incredibly internally miserable and trying to find ways to still be pleasant - it was tough, I often remind myself, if I could do it then I'll be able to do it always! On that note, it's important that we remember life is hard. Not just for us, but for everyone around us. We're all fighting a battle. I don't need to know the details, but I recognize this and appreciate the strength.

Good vibes rule #1 - recognize. The more we embrace in each other that the struggle is real, the more we can focus on our own self vibrations.

Good vibes rule #2 - be happy. I remember watching the Bachelor years and years and years ago, I believe Jesse the wine vineyard owner was the man of the hour (who is now, come to find out, a sports broadcaster for NCAA football, who knew??). Week after week the contestants kept saying "I just want to be happy". What does that even mean? Of course, we all want to be happy, but can we really be happy every day? Well the answer is YES! Take care of yourself FIRST. YOU are the priority and I say this as a wife, mother, daughter, etc. If I don't do the things that my body, mind, soul, and heart crave every day, I can't give. So my house is messy, I sometimes wait a day before washing the dishes. My son is taken care of, my husband is too and those things come before dishes or laundry. :-) Oh and I am happy from the inside out!

Good vibes rule #3 - your vibes start on the inside. What better way to fuel goodness than to feed yourself goodness fuel? What is goodness fuel, you ask? Healthy food :-) We all enjoy our wine or beer from time to time, but it's not exactly a recipe for overall good vibrations. My general rule of thumb (that I talk more extensively about during our 6W2C quarterly kick-offs) is to not put anything in your body that doesn't have an expiration date. Think about it. The healthier you feel, that happier you are, the more people want to be around you and feed off that.

Good vibes rule #4 - do your own shit. Nobody likes a follower. You wanna wear 2 different barresocks to Poised & HOT Bodies tomorrow? Do it! A teammate I cheered with years ago once answered one of my long-winded internal battles with what I wanted to wear on a given evening with a very simple: "If you don't care, why should I?". At the age of 15, I thought, how genius! Literally, this phrase goes through my head at lease once a week to this day. Be you - genuinely, whole-heartedly, transparently - the good, bad, ugly, and bizarre! I don't have a fake bone in my body, I can't do it. Usually my feelings are written all over my face, just the way I like it. I've done me every day - I arrived at the hospital to give birth to my son in a pair of high-heeled sneakers, because that's what I wanted to do, that's me - unapologetically.

Good vibes rule #5 - smile. I am so astonished on a daily basis of the amount of strangers I smile at in passing who give me zero in exchange. But, then there's that one who saves me day. THANK YOU kind stranger, I see you, and we're on the same page! :)

Good vibes rules #6 - don't get discouraged. Back to the people who don't smile back. I see you, too! And quite frankly, you discourage me. You make me not want to smile at people for fear I won't get it back, and sometimes, I don't. Don't get discouraged, be happy even when misery rears it's ugly head and it will come back around (in the good way this time). Sometimes I see unkindness in someone and I pause to realize it says more about them than it ever will about me. Pay attention to people who don't clap when you succeed and realize they need your prayers for the internal battle they must be fighting (back to good vibe #4!).

Good vibes rule #7 - never use the word HATE. Another mommy lesson, and now I hear my husband say it all the time as well. It is such an ugly and nasty word that just screams negative nelly and downer - and frankly, nobody wants to hear it (not to mention it isn't even very lady-like). The "H-word" is everything that is wrong with the world, and you don't have time to be a part of that, no matter how angry you feel.

Good vibes rule #8 - watch an episode of Sesame Street. No, really. My son is obsessed, I could recite season 46 in its entirety from beginning to end complete with songs and corresponding choreography. The life lessons, the simple messages, the diversity, and the appreciation for ALL people is remarkable. My husband and I were just saying last night, everyone should watch Sesame Street, the world would be a better place :-)

Isn't this a fitness studio blog? Yep, and back to the ever-wise Mark Wahlberg, "I want to sweat comin' out your pores!" Now that #poisenation has some good vibes tips, it's a great place to start! It's contagious in the basement of SParkle! Truth be told, it's been tough for me personally to get past the pregnancy hormones, but I practice my internal yoga daily and absolutely LOVE seeing my SPeeps everyday (even when they aren't tucking their hips hard enough during our glutes series at 8pm every Tuesday in The Bar(re) Straight Up!).

So go ahead, take a pen, jot down those 7 good vibes somewhere you'll see them. Close your eyes, take a deep breath, (maybe an internal bah-humbug if it feels better), open your eyes - and smile! After all, it is rule #5. 

Happy Weekend! <3

Danielle Roback

Studio Poise, 12 Salem St, Lynnfield, MA 01940, USA